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Friday 11 April 2008

A SWAZI LIFE WITH AIDS

Swaziland has the highest rate of HIV infection in the world. Organisations have different ways of counting the statistics but two that often get mentioned are: 40 percent of pregnant women in the kingdom are HIV-positive and one in three people who are of an age to be ‘sexually active’ have the virus.

These statistics are very difficult to get your head around. It means that wherever you are in Swaziland and if there are people around you then at least some of them (and maybe a lot of them) are HIV-positive. Sometimes here at the University of Swaziland I find myself looking at the students and thinking ‘at least one third of the people in this room are HIV-positive’ and wondering which ones it might be. And it blows my mind.

It’s silly to think like this, of course. It could be any of them or it could be none of them. My point is that with so many people with the virus it is very difficult to come to terms with the reality of HIV in Swaziland.

That’s why a column that appears most weeks in the Times Sunday is so special. Sanele Mdluli who is aged 25 writes about himself and ‘My Life With AIDS’. Sanele has known he was HIV-positive since he was aged 21 and he shares with readers his thoughts and experiences of what it’s like to be HIV-positive in Swaziland.

Unlike many of the people who write for the Swazi newspapers (including some full-time journalists) Sanele is articulate and expressive and he writes with searing honesty, which can be very challenging to readers.

Take this example (Times Sunday 2 March 2008),

‘Life has never been a bed of roses. The readers of this column have told me several times that I am an unhappy guy, just because my article oozes far more pain than joy, all this portrays me as one person bitter with life.

‘In actual fact, I have experienced far more of pain than joy. I have been battling with coming to terms with life. […]

‘I have tried to show a brave face in the face of adversity. I have had to make a lot of adjustments in my young life in order to be able to live a few days more. I have also had to face the painful truth of seeing some of my friends die, friends I have met in the cause of trying to survive. […]

‘In my quest to survive, I have sacrificed a sizeable amount of my happiness. For me life has lost its colour, it is one grey affair of HIV from morning till the sun sets. My whole mind and body, consciously or unconsciously, are always grappling with the reality of an impending painful death. Fort me it is all about avoiding the things that would place me closer to the clutches of AIDS. […]

‘My relationships have crumbled, my love life jumbled up just because of my status. I am not the only one here; a lot of families have split because of HIV. We live in a world of stigma where we are discriminated against because of HIV. We are told of our uselessness to the world as we are supposedly walking coffin material. People are waiting for our funeral dates.’

In another column (Times Sunday 30 March 2008), Sanele writes about his church and why he didn’t attend at Easter.

‘I lost my cool in church about last month after testifying in the church about my status. This is one thing I usually do to encourage the youth not to find itself in the same boat as me. I also encourage those already positive to live a better and productive health love life like I do.

‘On this day one pastor I won’t mention blessed with the gift of healing decided that I need a prayer that would cleanse me of HIV that is demonic and belongs to the devil. He indeed prayed for me and told yours truly to run to the VCT for a new test as I would test negative. While this man of God prayed hard, I was seething deep internally thinking of the millions who have been told they are negative by their pastors. And I got angry.

‘So to this day, I wish to go to church but I cannot because I will find this holy man and his prayers. He would also be asking me if I went to the VCT and the whole church is surely expecting my answer. It’s simple I ran to the VCT and still tested positive.’

These are just two examples from one of the best pieces of journalism available today in the Swazi newspapers. I have never met Sanele, but he seems to be one heck of a guy. Keep the articles coming, Sanele.

To finish on an upbeat note: Sanele’s article of 2 March 2008 must have alarmed some of his readers. He reassured them, (30 March 2008),

‘I have read the SMSs you sent me. Hey fellers, I am not bitter at life or sour at being HIV positive. If my articles portray that, I am so sorry as that is the truth as it is, that’s how I am. And people never think for a second I have lost interest in life or rather have lost hope. Me of all people!’

See also
BID TO IMPROVE HIV AIDS REPORTING

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